Loneliness is a human condition we all experience for various reasons at all stages of life.
In the elderly, especially, loneliness and isolation are considered risk factors for serious health issues, including depression, cognitive decline, longer hospital stays, and generally decline more quickly when they lack social support and connection with another being.
Lois was in her 70s when I started working with her. She had recently lost her husband of 50 years and was profoundly depressed. She was living far from her grown children who had their own lives, and she expressed passive suicidal ideation on occasion. Weighed down by her despair, Lois stopped leaving her house. She slept most of the day, ate very small meals, and saw little purpose to interact with the world.
Lois lived in a retirement community for seniors, but felt no motivation to meet her neighbors or
participate in activities she used to enjoy, so her daughter suggested that she get a dog. Lois adopted
Mugsy, her snorty, smooshed face, pug mix.
It wasn’t long before Lois was leaving the house to walk Mugsy, that she started to meet neighbors, and she even started crocheting again, which she hadn’t been able to concentrate on since her husband passed. She cried when she talked about how much Mugsy brought her joy again, increased the quality of her life, and how he helped her want to live again.
Gwen is another client I worked with in her late 60s. She was the caregiver for her mother who had recently passed from Alzheimer´s, her husband had just had a stroke and although would make a full recovery, she was also his caregiver until then. Gwen was unable to work due to circumstances, and she was also struggling with her own medical and mobility issues. She had severe arthritis and was in constant pain. Gwen complained that she wasn’t sleeping because she was incessantly worrying at night about her husband’s health, while ignoring her own compiling stressors. Her husband suggested she adopt a cat, since cats had always been part of the lives, but lost their last one the year prior.
Gwen adopted Buster, a giant sized 9 year old ginger cat whose previous owner had died. It didn’t take long before Gwen found herself smiling more, she had a new sense of purpose in Buster and she
delighted in his neediness and head-butts. Gwen told me that she was able to sleep better at night
because Buster laid next to her, purring, which helped slow her thoughts and reminded her to slow her breathing.
Want to learn more about loneliness and how to help yourself? Here are a few resources. https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/loneliness-and-social-isolation/loneliness-and-social-isolation-tips-
staying-connected
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/loneliness
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